remove waste flags from both conference and member and explicitly always send audio from conferences to avoid random interop issues and general discomfort these flags are now depricated

This fixes all build errors.
(Stand-alone build of FreeTDM worked fine, for some
 i-don't-really-want-to-know strange reason).
Signed-off-by: Stefan Knoblich <stkn@openisdn.net>

Needed for the mISDN/mISDNif.h header structs, linux/types.h only
provides them for kernel code:

In file included from src/ftmod/ftmod_misdn/ftmod_misdn.c:51:
/usr/include/mISDN/mISDNif.h:296: error: expected specifier-qualifier-list before 'u_int'
/usr/include/mISDN/mISDNif.h:306: error: expected specifier-qualifier-list before 'u_int'
/usr/include/mISDN/mISDNif.h:339: error: expected ')' before 'nr'
...
Signed-off-by: Stefan Knoblich <stkn@openisdn.net>

Fixed a memory leak, too short of connect times across data centers, a deadlock condition with the globals.bindings_rwlock not being released, a buffer overrun possibility or 4, and added the ability to send a body when injecting an event

prevent sql injection by using sqlite formatter on various code that generates sql stmts with switch_snprintf

This partially reverts commit 991b83d2.